rainbows.

he believes in beauty
he believes in muses
he holds onto individuality
he takes reality every day
and he idealizes it away for her
and he throws himself into everything
as if in a last ditch effort
and he paints all of the tragedy
in the colors of the rainbow
because she still thinks they are a beautiful inevitability.

and he is her hero
and maybe he will never know.
she can't tell him

what if he did know?
what if he found out?
it wouldn't be the same.
he can't have to live up to it
or it isn't the same.

what if he promised not to change?
is that a risk to take
to satisfy curiosity?
she can't lose her hero.

and she wants a hero

---MRS 12/13/07

turnaround

turnaround
and read it over
it was never really about her

she never wrote it for herself in the first place
but she never really knew that

turnaround, though.
it's there.
it's all out on the table.

she's not fair,
writing just for her
but it comes out for other people.

----MRS 12/9/07

everything is cool again.

it isn't fair
how she's the only one
sitting in her room
sitting all by herself
and she can't stop crying
and nobody wants her enough

and it's not fair
how she saw this coming
and how she didn't even try to stop it.

because she said
she said that this would happen
and she has seen this all before
and she crys herself to sleep at night.
and it rains.
and she sits there, all by herself.
and she crys herself to sleep.

and it's really really really not fair
because this time she didn't do anything
this time she was alreay miserable
and this time nobody can fix it.

because now she's stuck being all by herself
and it's not like it really matters
because nobody really wants her enough.
so it's not like she really matters.

----MRS 12/7/07